I encourage you all to visit the newly-updated Tribute to the C.C. Hat and Danny Ferry Memorial Cavaliers' White Guy Hall of Fame. Both are extensive references maintained by myself, with occassional help from Corey, on my personal website. I don't host them on the Mistake by the Lake Sporting Times because unfortunately Blogger allows you to do only so many things with their posting interface.

New to the "Tribute to the C.C. Hat" this year (besides updated comments and new players to list) are the "Players to Watch for 2005", an update to last year's Players to Watch, and a new list of C.C. Hat traitors. New to the "Danny Ferry Memorial" are recent Cavalier additions like Luke Jackson, Jiri Welsch, etc. and pictures of each player.

I hope you enjoy. I spend ridiculous amounts of time browsing through the player pages of every man on every 40-man roster in the MLB and I'd appreciate to hear any comments you have.

I wish I had thought to look into this before I posted my Cavs "season in review" article, because it pretty compellingly depicts the Cavaliers' 2004-05 season in a positive light. So consider this an appendix to what I posted a few days ago.

Many of you are surely already familiar with the concept of Pythagorean win percentage, especially with respect to baseball. It determines a team's likely winning percentage based upon the total points (or runs) scored and allowed over the course of a season. It is generally agreed to be a truer measure of a team's ability than its actual win percentage. In other words, it can tell you, among other things, which teams, by either out-performing or under-performing their Pythagorean win percentages, were either lucky or unlucky in a given season.

Here are the final Pythagorean standings in the Eastern Conference this year:

Rank    Team   Pyth W-L   Actual  Diff.
  1   Miami      59-23     59-23    0
  2   Detroit    53-29     54-28   +1
  3   Chicago    44-38     47-35   +3
 t-4  Cleveland  43-39     42-40   -1
 t-4  Boston     43-39     45-37   +2
 t-4  Indiana    43-39     44-38   +1
  7   Washington 40-42     45-37   +5
  8   Philly     39-43     43-39   +4
 t-9  New Jersey 36-46     42-40   +6
 t-9  Toronto    36-46     33-49   -3
 11   Orlando    35-47     36-46   +1
 12   New York   34-48     33-49   -1
 13   Milwaukee  32-50     30-52   -2
 14   Charlotte  24-58     18-64   -6
 15   Atlanta    16-66     13-69   -3

The Cavs played more or less up to their expected level, but look how many playoff teams were presumably lucky! These standings actually suggest that the Cavs were about the fourth-best team in the East; that they were worthy of the #5 seed; that the mighty Bulls were only about a game better! Notice especially how undeserving of a playoff spot New Jersey is! They're tied with Toronto. Notice, too, how Boston, Indiana, Washington, and Philly all lucked out in the actual standings. This is just another example of an outside phenomenon conspiring to make the Cavaliers' season look worse than it actually was. I thought it was worth pointing out, at least.

Last updated: 11:10 PM

Okay, the boring first day is over. It's time for the part we've all been waiting for: obscure players with funny names! Just as we did yesterday, Alex and I will publish updates to this post throughout the day with commentary on the Browns' last four draftees and random observations, so be sure to keep checking back.

I tried to convince Alex to head on over to the Javits center (where the draft is taking place) for a hour or so, just so we could have an eyewitness report. But he's not into the idea. He's also under the impression they will charge him money for admission. Anyone know about this?

11:50 AM

Alex says: Wow, apparently today the festivities started at 11, not 12. Oh well, I missed the live selection of Antonio Perkins, a corner from Oklahoma (just like Brodney). He was a fantastic punt returner in college, holding the NCAA records for most yards in a game and most touchdowns during a career. For a fourth rounder, Perkins seems a like a very good pick. Although he is lacking a little in the name department. Hopefully Nickname Master Corey can think up something good. I am getting a little worried because once you get to the 5th round, finding any starters is akin to a miracle and still no offensive lineman have been selected by the Browns. I doubt Joe Andruzzi alone can remake the line.

In more important news, Braylon Edwards was actually in Cleveland by last night. How did that happen? Anyways, during his press conference, Edwards revealed he will wear #17 as a Brown. As the roster stands right now, only #84 and #88 are free as "normal" WR numbers. And I assume that we're keeping #88 free just so when the Browns sign Stadium Mustard back for the fourth time, he can have his old jersey.

Charlie Frye has yet to announce a number, but unfortunately he wore #5 in college. With Garcia gone, it's safe to assume that Frye will take #5 again. Corey brought up an interesting point: what do the jersey numbers of every worthwhile Brown QB have in common? Frank Ryan, #13; Otto Graham, #14; Milt Plum, #16; Brian Sipe, #17; Bernie Kosar, #19. Every single good quarterback in Browns history has a number in the teens. I'm not saying this will necessarily affect Frye's career, but I strongly suggest he wears #15.

1:22 PM

Alex says: The Browns rectified the overcrowded QB-situation by trading Luuuuuuke to the Bucaneers for a 6th-round pick. This is astounding. Does Tampa Bay really think that Luke McCown will turn out better than whatever they could get with an early 6th-rounder? When nearly a tenth of all of your throws are interceptions (and let's not forget the occassional dropped interceptions), you shouldn't even make the excuse of "rookie mistakes."

I'm happy to see Luke go, although I don't know why Browns fans, and maybe even the front office, are so fond of Josh Harris. Perhaps the team just couldn't get enough return for Harris and had to bite the bullet and trade away Luke. With an extra draft pick the Browns can absolutely get more of the depth that they lack. Maybe some offensive linemen, hint hint.

Phil Savage finally attended to an area seen as a real need for the Browns next season by drafting DE David McMillan from that NFL-superstar factory, Kansas. The official NFL prospect report on him is overflowing with annoying football idioms like "McMillan also needs to decide if he has the fire and desire to play the game at the next level," or "he plays with an inconsistent motor and it is rare when he shows any urgency in his play." I think those can be summed up as: his work ethic is questionable.

4:25 PM

Corey says: Well, two more picks have gone by, in sixth-rounders Nick Speegle and Andrew Hoffman. While Speegle is a decent name, the Browns have yet to select any totally awesome obscure ones. They've got one shot left. Last year, they nabbed Adimchinobe Echemandu in the 7th round. I've got my fingers crossed.

Take a look at the third round enjoyed by the Rams yesterday. Talk about a slam dunk! With two third-round picks, St. Louis nabbed Oshiomogho Atogwe and the much-coveted (by Alex and me, that is) Richie Incognito. I am so jealous.

But enough of the name obsession for now. The Browns have still not selected any offensive linemen, and even if they do so in the last round, it won't mean anything. It looks like we're going into the season with last year's line, plus Andruzzi and Coleman. I'm holding my breath, hoping that will be enough. After Braylon Edwards, the Browns have really concentrated on defense in this draft, which is okay with me, except that the offense still needs help. I think the defense is set for a while.

4:58

Alex says: The Browns completely wasted whatever chance was left to grab a really awesome name by drafting tackle Jon Dunn from Virginia Tech. Just four picks after the Browns nabbed Dunn, the Buccaneers selected Razzy Rick Razzano, a RB from Missouri. The chances of Dunn ever being anything above a backup are slim, so why not roll the dice with a guy named "Razzano"?

That said though, I am glad the Browns finally added an offensive linemen although we all have our doubts as to Dunn's likelihood of playing time. Hopefully this won't morph into a Joaquin Gonzalez situaion. The NFL "Prospect Profile" of Dunn paints him as a mammoth (6'7", 328) with poor fundamentals. He's survived on aggression and size for this long. Maybe the Browns' famed offensive line coach, uh... Some Guy, can make him into a solid blocker.

11:10 PM

Corey says: I'm just here to wrap things up and give my overall impressions of each draft pick, now that I have watched their press conferences and heard what everyone's been saying.

First, Braylon Edwards comes off as a very easy-going guy, which I appreciate. In his press conference, he kept coming back to how eager he is to make friends with the team. His answers were somewhat rushed, though, and many of them sounded like they were prepared beforehand. For some reason, he made the mistake of saying that he was very excited about the Browns having drafted Dan Cody, the defensive lineman, which, of course, they did not do. Edwards also totally dissed on of my favorite players, Andre Davis, by saying how excited he was to be joining "two great receivers like Dennis Northcutt and Antonio Bryant".

Brodney Pool, for some reason, reminds me of Jiff from "Bowfinger". You know, Eddie Murphy's nerdy, naive character (not to be confused with Kit, Murphy's other character, the neurotic movie star). I think it's the way Brodney talks. Also, he is extremely young for an NFL draftee and he has a certin naivete about him.

Charlie Frye won me over with the following exchange:

Reporter: [something unintelligible] ...Bernie, yesterday. Would you like to wear number 19?

Frye: No, I believe Frisman Jackson wears that number.

Awesome. Now how does he know that, one day after being drafted? He either roots for the Browns or has been studying game film already.

As for the other five draftees, they haven't held press conferences with them yet. I can say that Brodney Pool is extremely excited that the Browns drafted Antonio Perkins, his fellow defensive back at Oklahoma. Apparently Perkins is a punt return specialist. I'm excited about him. Anyway, thanks to everyone who enjoyed our draft coverage. Football season isn't as far away as it seems!

Last updated: 9:53 PM

Sports media will soon be ridiculously overrun with pundits analyzing every conceivable aspect of the NFL Draft. We here at the Mistake by the Lake Sporting Times are nothing if not quick to copycat, so we decided to become draft pundits ourselves. Check back on this 'blog periodically during the draft, for Corey and I will sporadically update this post with our thoughts on possible moves for the Browns, evaluations of Browns' selections, and other general nonsense you have come to expect from us. With Butch Davis gone, we are left to wonder what new and exciting ways the Browns will come up with to piss away seven draft picks.

1:10 PM

Alex says: The Browns just took Braylon Edwards with the third pick. I feel unusually ambivalent about this selection. Sure, it doesn't hurt to have more talent, but is wide receiver such a team need? But then again, it's well known that GM Phil Savage will always take the "best player available" rather than for a team need. I agree with Savage's strategy, but every time I think of Edwards all I see is David Terell. Mike Williams seems to me to be a much better wideout prospect.

Did anyone else notice Edwards's watch? It was displayed during the first minute or so of the telecast and was very easy to miss. But dear Lord, that watch blew my mind. It must weigh at least 15 pounds.

1:55 PM

Corey says: Braylon Edwards, huh? I respect Phil Savage's strategy of drafting the best player available, regardless, but it's really a strategy for the long term. We've been hearing a lot of people say "well, since the Browns have a need at every single position, they should just take the best guy available and it will automatically be filling a need". The problem is that there are just a few positions where the Browns simply have no need. Tight end, for example. Running back, thank God. Linebacker, I would argue (at least compared to all the other needs). And, frankly, wide receiver. Before today, the Browns went three deep at receiver, with three very good players (though, the argument goes, none of them are "stars" -- except that Andre Davis certainly has the potential to be a big star). They also had Kellen Winslow stepping in, with the potential to be a big time pass-catching weapon. Now they go four deep, five if you count Kellen, which is fine--I'm all for depth--but they have so many needs still to address. I know, I have to be patient. There's a lot of draft left. Frankly, I would be quite happy to see the Browns acquire another second or third round pick for, say, Antonio Bryant. That would certainly justify the pick of Braylon Edwards beyond all doubts.

5:18 PM

Corey says: Well, there are about 12 picks left now before the Browns are up again, which means it will only be another 22 hours or so... The anticipation is palpitating! I wish I could say I have been enjoying the rest of the first round, but between Chris Berman's intolerable excuse for commentary and the incessant waiting, I must confess to falling asleep on my couch for about two hours. But hey, it's the NFL Draft! Two hours in draft time is like 10 minutes in people time. Of the parts I did see, though, and the recap, I have to say the highlights were watching Aaron Rodgers generally sweating it out and looking like he was trying not to cry over in the green room, as well as New Orleans' brilliant move of swooping in via trade to snatch up their division rival's coveted prospect just one pick before Carolina's. My hopes for the Browns in round two? Address the offensive line or the defensive secondary. I don't have much of a sense of who will be available or which positions are strongest at that point in the depth chart, so to speak, so I'll give Phil Savage the benefit of the doubt no matter whom he picks, so long as it's not a receiver, a back, or a tight end.

Meanwhile, the race is on to see who lands Mike Nugent. I know it won't be the Browns, but this is the kind of thing that rivets me to my sofa. It would be cool if he went to the Packers so he could be reunited with B.J. Sander as the greatest kicking combo since Groza and Collins. Okay, maybe I'm getting a little carried away.

6:41 PM

Alex says: This just in! Mike Nugent remains undrafted.

After enjoying the cinematic genius of Coyote Ugly and Krippendorf's Tribe, I tuned back to ESPN2 and heard the Vice Commissioner announce the Browns had drafted a player from Oklahoma. I assumed it was Dan Cody, but it was not so.

Brodney Pool, according to Mel Kiper, would be a Top 10 pick next year--but came out early. Since Pool is so young, Corey suggests that the Browns are planning to throw next season in an effort to Tank for Leinart, but that doesn't seem quite right to me. Pool apparently could be a perfectly fine safety and I don't know why Corey is so confident in the Browns current safeties: with Little and Griffith out, it's down to a recovering Sean Jones, Chris Crocker, and maybe someone like Dyshod Carter who could switch from corner.

The team has now taken two players: Braylon and Brodney. Notice any similarities? It seems that the Browns should look into drafting Brock Berlin, a QB from Miami, Brady Poppinga, an OLB from BYU, or even Brian Claybourn, a P from Western Kentucky. Actually, who'd I'd love to see the Browns nab is Richie Incognito, an OL from Nebraska who actually sat out last year. Apparently he is one of the best blockers in the entire draft, but has a terrible temper. I just want him for the name.

6:53 PM

Corey says: Hey, I expressed no confidence in any Browns safeties, departed or otherwise. I only wondered which safety position Brodney would take. Personally, I'm excited for a safety corps of Sean Jones and Brodney Pool. Didn't I just say I wanted them to address the secondary?

You can't spell "Braylon Edwards" without "Browns". For that matter, you can't spell "Braylon" without "L'Bron". I'm just saying. I notice these things.

9:53

Alex says: In a demonstration of the magnitude of their stupidity, Jets fans present at the NFL Draft actually booed the team's selection of kicking/Heisman candidate Mike Nugent. I don't think anyone doubted that Jets fans were a little dim, but this should serve to cement this fact for the rest of human existence.

Phil Savage has already proven what an unpredictable character he is by the 3rd round. Just when we all thought he would take Brian Claybourne, he chooses "hometown" boy Charlie Frye. The matter of being "hometown" or not is confusing because Charlie is from scenic Willard. Cleveland technically is the closest city with an NFL team, so hopefully Charlie grew up a Browns fan. But you can never be too sure when it comes to Western Ohio, some people are liable to even be Lions fans, ick.

I'm not particularly excited by Frye, but not disappointed either. He should be a perfectly decent QB for the Browns in a couple of years. Plus, his being-from-Ohioness can only make him much more likeable to the average Browns fan. But the Browns really should let Dilfer start the entire season, and let Frye train.

How can it have only been nine hours of the NFL draft so far? It seems like its been only a few minutes or so. Don't you agree? I don't know about you, but I can't wait to spend my entire Sunday watching teams draft guys I have never heard of and will likely never hear of again.

The 2004-05 season will largely be remembered as a disappointment for the Cavaliers. But hey, we're Cavaliers fans; when was the last season that wasn't a disappointment? I guess you could call the Tank For LeBron Campaign a success. I guess.

Anyway, I am here to bring you my season-wrap rant, which is, surprisingly, less pessimistic than you might think. Yes, I believe the Cavaliers failed. But I also believe that a number of outside phenomena conspired to make their failure look worse than it actually was.

For one, the Cavaliers had a much easier schedule in the first half than in the second half. By mid-January, the team had already played all four of its games against Charlotte (.220 win percentage), three of its four games against Atlanta (.159), both of its games against Portland (.329), both of its games against Golden State (.415), and one of its two games against both New Orleans (.220) and Utah (.317). And the Cavaliers went 13-0 in those contests. Would they still have beat up on those (admittedly horrible) teams had they played them later in the season, when the Cavs were supposedly struggling? I think it's a fair assumption. (The Cavs did go 3-0 against those same teams in the second half.)

I think a lot of people jacked up their expectations for the Cavs sometime around mid-January. The Cavs were in line to become the #2 seed in the East. If we had tried to adjust for strength of schedule, though, our expectations would have been seriously tempered. It's time to face the fact that, despite whatever win total they were on pace for, the Cavaliers were closer to a 45-win team all along than a 55-win team who suddenly collapsed.

There is also some danger in judging a team mid-season based on its projected playoff seed rather than its projected win total. To say that the Cavs went from the #2 seed in mid-January to the #9 seed at season's end is a little deceptive. During the second half of the season, five other teams in the East (Pistons, Bulls, Celtics, Pacers, Sixers) experienced impressive turnarounds, leapfrogging the Cavs in the process. I don't hold other teams' success against the Cavaliers. It's likely that the Cavs' playoff seed would have dropped a few spots even if they had continued to play so well.

I thought it might be interesting to look at the East standings as they unfolded over the whole season. So I made a graph depicting each team's progress, game by game. Because I included all 15 teams in the East, the graph is a little busy, I know, so I'm sorry if it's hard to read. The Cavs are represented by the maroon line.



A few things jump out at me from this graphic. First, the Cavs' rise and fall was much more gradual than I thought. They spent a long time just middling before taking a downward turn. Second, look at the Nets (the gray line). Talk about taking the back door into the playoffs. They're like the 2002 Browns of the NBA. With 20 games to go in the season, the Nets had the same chance of making the playoffs as the Bucks, Raptors, and Knicks. New Jersey's late winning streak is impressive--I don't mean to discount it--but they really lucked out when it came to the late-season woes of the Cavaliers and Magic. If justice prevails, the Nets will completely get blown away in the first round of the playoffs. Finally, I want to point out that the most impressive line in the graph is the Bulls' (the red one), for obvious reasons. I really hate the Bulls, and I hope they get swept out of the first round, but I have to give them credit for an extraordinarily unlikely season.

But back to the Cavaliers. I don't mean to imply that the 2005 team is completely without blame; I do, however, want to argue that 42 wins isn't such a terrible result. I really like the point made by Brian Windhorst a week ago on his blog: that 42 wins doesn't look so bad when you consider the progression from season to season, especially when you compare LeBron's Cavs to Jordan's Bulls (the team we should be trying to emulate).

• 2003 Cavs: 17 wins (no LeBron)
• 2004 Cavs: 35 wins (LeBron age 19)
• 2005 Cavs: 42 wins (LeBron age 20)
• 2006 Cavs: 50 or so wins? This seems like a reasonable expectation.

• 1984 Bulls: 27 wins (no Jordan)
• 1985 Bulls: 38 wins (Jordan age 21)
• 1986 Bulls: 30 wins (Jordan age 22)
• 1987 Bulls: 40 wins (Jordan age 23)
• 1988 Bulls: 50 wins (Jordan age 24)

And the Bulls didn't win their first title until 1991. Patience, everyone. Besides, 42 wins is usually good enough to make the playoffs, especially in the weak East. It's not the Cavs' fault that this happened to be the one year that 42 wins wasn't quite enough. Last season, 42 wins was good enough to get Miami the #4 seed! 42 wins also would have been good enough to make the playoffs in the East in 2003, 2002, 2001, and 2000. And, returning to the list above, Jordan's Bulls managed to make the playoffs in 1985, 1986, and 1987 with 38, 30, and 40 wins, respectively. Can you imagine going 30-52 and making the playoffs?!

The Cavaliers really should have made the playoffs. These last couple days, I have had a feeling similar to the one I had on the last day of the baseball season in 2000. Remember that? The Indians did their part, tearing apart the Blue Jays on the strength of one of Manny Ramirez' greatest performances as an Indian (his very last, in fact). Then we had to wait for the result of the Mariners game, hoping beyond hope that the Angels might pull off an unlikely upset. But it was not to be. It's a terrible feeling.

Now the Cavs have to think about their offseason. I think Alex covered most of what the organization has to do in his recent post. The team has already accomplished Alex's step 1, having fired Jim Paxson approximately 30 seconds after the season ended. Good riddance. Now the important thing for step 2 is to hire a general manager who's smart and not necessarily famous. Dan Gilbert strikes me as the type of owner who cares about public opinion and his own reputation. I just pray he doesn't fall for, say, the next Isiah Thomas simply because of all the hype it would generate.

As for the draft, this, of course, is the year that we will finally relinquish the first-round pick we gave up in the Wes Person trade, which previously had been lottery-protected (meaning, since we missed the playoffs yet again, we would still get to hold on to the pick), except that, somehow, due to our mid-season trade with Boston, the "lottery-protected" part is no longer applicable. So now Charlotte gets our pick, even if we win the lottery (with a 0.60% chance of doing so). But hey, we got Jiri Welsch out of it! That was totally worth it.

One last thing. Much of the talk between now and next season will be about whether or not LeBron is happy and whether or not he'll bolt in two years, when his rookie contract expires. A lot can happen in two years. If the Cavs continue to disappoint and miss the playoffs, then sure, LeBron will probably be unhappy, and eager to find a new team. But just how likely is that to happen? People are overreacting. They don't seem to realize that LeBron's happiness in the summer of 2007 will have very little to do with the events of the 2004-05 season. The number one objective for the new GM should most definitely be to make sure LeBron signs another contract with Cleveland. But the two best ways to make LeBron happy are to offer him the most money, and to be successful in 2006 and 2007. There simply is no reason to panic yet.

Before I get started, let me note that according to "THE OFFICIAL SITE OF THE CLEVELAND CAVALIERS," the team's "quest for the postseason begins tonight against Paul Pierce and Celtics at the Gund." Finally! Maybe now they'll start trying.

The beginning of the 2005 baseball season has been especially tough on me. Despite all the resources available on the internet to help me follow the Tribe, nothing can beat sitting in the cold, uncomfortable green plastic seats of Jacobs Field. But soon the semester shall be finished, and I can return to the promised land. But until then, only I can dream about watching some live baseball in Cleveland. And I do. There are just certain things I can't wait to do at Jacobs Field.

• Get a grilled hot dog
• Listen to John Adams pound away
• Try the new Batter's Eye stand in the center field patio
• Play the hat game on the JumboTron--I always win, I am the master.
• Johnny Applestix
• Savor that first high-five of the season from Slider
• Listen to the postgame intro of "Karn Evil 9" by Emerson, Lake and Palmer on your official news station, WTAM, sitting in post-game traffic

I'll be seeing you fellow Indians fans very soon. It can't come quick enough.

Despite a couple bad performances by Bob Wickman, which we all knew we're coming anyway, the Indians' bullpen so far has been phenomenal. I would like to highlight especially the play of a certain Rafael Betancourt, who gave up his first hit and run of the season yesterday. I'm certain this level of performance team-wide is unsustainable, but even if the bullpen levels off the hitting should pick up to more than make up for it.

The Indians now travel west to take on the Los Angeles Angels of the Western Hemisphere. Bartolo Colon, who starts for the Angels tomorrow night, will finally face off against Grady Sizemore, for whom he was traded to the 'xpos.

First off, I'd like to begin advertising the Mistake by the Lake Sporting Times 2005 NFL Draft coverage. As it is planned right now, Corey and I will write-up our assessment of each of the Browns' picks shortly after their selection and post them to the site. It will be our first attempt at pseudo-liveblogging. And we'll be doing this for both days of the draft, because we all know you can find great value even in the last rounds (Ryan Pontbriand anyone?).

My recent discussion of the Cavaliers' upcoming off-season, and the following debate about free agency has sparked an intrigue in me. Loyal reader Marc claims, "Clevelanders always complain that our teams never sign the big, marquee free agent." This definitely seems true on first glance. This has inspired me to do a little rudimentary research on free agency, and it's place in Cleveland sports.

Cleveland Indians Free Agents

I was planning on giving an educational summary of how free agency came about in Major League Baseball--but then I came upon Doug Pappas's amazing work. Just read it. Sadly for our Tribe, the only notable signings by the team for the longest time was granting free agency to overrated over-the-hill players and then resigning them, like Rick Manning and Andre Thornton. Now let's take a look at the nominees for the best free agent signing in Tribe history, in chronological order:

Doug Jones, RP, 3/3/85: Finally, after nearly 10 years of terrible free agents being dragged into Municipal Stadium, Jones shows up, but it wasn't easy. As he tells it, he signed to play AA and the next season was finally called up for a cup of coffee. The next year he was in the major league bullpen to stay. Jones was solid to great in 6 seasons in the Tribe's bullpen.

Tom Candiotti, SP, 12/12/85: Candiotti pitched well on some mediocre to miserably bad Indian teams in the late '80s. Of course no one will forget his riveting comeback attempt with the Indinas in 1999, when he managed to allow 18 earned runs in 14.2 innings.

Bartolo Colon, SP, 6/26/93: Fortunately the Indians knew to sell high, but Colon really was the best starter the Tribe had during his six seasons at the Jake.

Victor Martinez, C, 7/15/96: VMart, like Bartobolo, signed as a non-drafted free agent--as Venezuelans are want to do. It's way too early to name Victor as an all-time great at anything, but a Silver Slugger in his "rookie" year is impressive.

Roberto Alomar, 2B, 12/1/98: He won't go in the Hall of Fame as an Indian but, without a doubt, Robbie had his best seasons in Cleveland. And they're among the best seasons all-time for a second baseman.

Honorable mentions: Jorge Orta, Eric Plunk, Alvaro Espinoza, Dennis Martinez, Eddie Murray, Ellis Burks

Robbie Alomar peaked during his years in Cleveland and was among the best of all time at his position. It might be a while until Cleveland sees another Vizquel to Alomar. Of the nominees, unless VMart starts tearin' it up, Robbie's the only Hall of Famer. He wins as best Indian free agent signing in a landslide.

Cleveland Cavaliers Free Agents

Oh geez, and you thought the Indians were bad. In all serious, I could only find three players during the entire Cavaliers history signed as free agents who played significant playing time and didn't contribute negative value. The honorable mentions list ought to be good for a few laughs, or cringes. I do readily admit that there is a strong chance I missed a good player somewhere. That is because there is no online resource to look up historical NBA transactions.

Craig Ehlo, SG, 1/5/87: Ehlo, now famous for being the Santa Claus from Lubbock, Texas and being served by M***** J***** that one time, was signed in the middle of the 86-87 season. Ehlo was an underrated role player and a very good outside shooter for seven years in Richfield.

Gerald Wilkins, SG, 10/8/92: Yes, I'm serious. In the interest of padding this list I had to add Wilkins. Gerald, of course is best known for being the brother of the Human Highlight Reel, Dominique Wilkins. Gerald was pretty decent as a Cavalier, shooting a .483 eFG%.

Earl Boykins, PG, 3/10/99: Twice the Cavs signed little Earl to 10-day contracts only to lock him up for the rest of the season soon after and stupidly cut him loose during the summer. Earl finally got his shot in Denver and is now continuously proving the Cavaliers stupid. Some of the depth problems with the current team could be alleviated with a fantastic backup PG like my man, Earl Boykins.

Honorable mentions: Bryant Stith, a corpse, Ira "Worst PER in the NBA" Newble, Kevin Ollie, Tractor "Robert" Traylor

I'd say the best signing was Craig Ehlo. While I love Earl Boykins and believe him to be a superior player, Ehlo was a "key" (and I use that lightly) contributor for late '80s and early '90s Cavs. CEh wins on tenure alone.

Cleveland Browns Free Agents

Full free agency got its latest start in the NFL. After the use of replacement players, the NFL instituted "Plan B Free Agency." I'm not exactly sure how it works, but it appears that it means you could only sign with another team if you sucked. Starting in 1993, free agency as we know it now more or less came into existence. The Browns have definitely built the most through free agency of the Cleveland teams. This is probably necessary when all of your draft picks turn to crap.

Matt Stover, K, 1991: If Stover weren't to have stayed with the organization and become a Baltimoron, I would give him more props. That said though, Stover performed at his normal level when in Cleveland, making him quite a good kicker. Coincidentally, Stover backed up former Brown Matt Bahr as a Giant before signing with the Browns.

Vinny Testaverde, QB, 1993: Vinny was hated for replacing Bernie Kosar, but played pretty well despite the bad memories. His 7.8 yards/attempt in his first year is still a career high. Vinny only stayed in Cleveland for three season because a certain unmentionable person committed a certain unmentionable act.

Chris Gardocki, P, 1999: No matter Corey's delusions, Gardocki still stands as the greatest punter in the history of the Browns, nay, the world! For all the flak Dwight Clark gets these days for being such an idiot, he did bring in Phil Dawson and Chris Gardocki. What more could you ask?

Jamir Miller, OLB, 1999: This speaks more about the Browns than Miller, but Jamir remains as the only new Brown to play in the Pro Bowl, as a starter no less. Miller's career was cut short during a preseason game in Minnesota in 2002, so consider this a case of lost potential.

Orpheus Roye, DT, 2000: No matter the team turmoil surrounding him, and it seems pretty constant these days, Roye is consistently solid. Unfortunately, Roye may be the only non-special teams Browns I could say that about.

Honorable mentions: Keenan McCardell, Corey Fuller, Kelly Holcomb, Ross Verba, Robert Griffith, Kenard Lang, Leigh Bodden

I think Chris Gardocki gave the greatest contribution to the Browns during his time of all the players mentioned here. Orpheus has been solid and all, but was he ever an All-Pro or the best player on the team (as Gardocki was)? Overall, I'd say the Browns have a knack for signing declining veterans only to realize they're overrated, see Percy Ellsworth, Dwayne Rudd, Earl Holmes, Robert Griffith, and so on.

It seems that Marc was right to say "our teams never sign the big, marquee free agent." The only real slam dunk within this entire article, in my opinion, is Robbie Alomar. Gardocki was great to have, but in the end, was still just a punter and could be involved on a maximum of 15 snaps during a game. Fortunately, things are looking up for Clevelanders. The Cavaliers will hopefully be wise with their salary cap space, especially since there is finally an incentive to playing for the Cavs; Phil Savage seems competent enough to rebuild the Browns; and Mark Shapiro is the best GM in baseballl, so you can't go wrong there. We should realize that it is very important to develop your own talent to succeed whether that be by the draft or by signing young, unknown players.

There may very well be playoff basketball in Cleveland's near future, but in my mind, I'm already past that. Whether or not the Cavaliers make the playoffs this season (and frankly, right now it's looking like a strong "not"), everyone should agree that the team needs to make serious changes to both the front office and the roster if the team is to become an elite in the NBA. I present my six (hopefully) simple steps that would make the Cavs successful:

1. Fire Jim Paxson. I don't have the time or space to go into all of Paxson's failings, but thankfully Keith Berzanske of RealGM has already done a fantastic job chronicling Paxson's moves as General Manager of the Cavaliers.
   
   
2. Hire a new General Manager with experience in an NBA front office. Jerry West and Joe Dumars make nice exceptions to the rule, but guys like Isaiah Thomas, Danny Ainge, and Elgin Baylor ought to scare you straight. Former NBA players especially seem to think they're qualified to judge talent because they were around it so much during their playing careers--but we know that being GM is more than just judging talent. And even then NBA players aren't so adept at identifying real talent rather than trying to find clones of past teammates. I strongly emphasize this past point because of scary rumors.
   
   
3. Hire a statisical wizard to consult with the new General Manager. It is pretty well-known that stathead and former scout Dean Oliver has helped revitalize the Sonics, so why can't the Cavaliers join in too? It certainly would be nice for the Cavaliers to hire away Oliver, but doubtful. Another dream would be for the team to hire the biggest name in basketball statistic nerdom, John Hollinger. This step is pretty much a pipe dream of mine, if the Cavaliers were to wise up and utilize the amazing advantages modern statisical analysis offers this summer, I would eat my Herbert Perry-autographed Indians hat.
   
   
4. Hire an unknown coach. I'd prefer an unknown coach because he'd be that much less likely to clash with management over playing style. I imagine a situation where the new General Manager devises a profile for the team (be it fast break, slow-down, or 3-point crazy) and dictates this style of play to the coach. Once again, this is copying the success of the Supersonics who compiled a roster of shooters and offensive rebounders, and their playcalling emphasizes their strengths.
   
   Most importantly, avoid college coaches like the plague. The number of college coaches who successfully jumped to the pros is so small we can count it on one finger: Larry Brown. NBA bombs, on the other hand, are plentiful: Rick Pitino, Tim Floyd, John Calipari, Lon Kruger, Jerry Tarkanian, Mike Montgomery, Leonard Hamilton, and Kevin O'Neill in recent years. I know some of those names will no longer ring a bell. I dare you to look them up.
   
   I hope that the Cavaliers hire an NBA assistant who hasn't yet gotten his big chance. Why hire a retread--knowing that he can never be above merely average at best? Overall, as long as the new coach would listen to the plan set out by the front office and devise strategies to maximize the strengths of various roster constructions, I'll be happy.
   
   
5. Don't break the bank on free agents. The Cleveland sports rumor mill has been humming along all season about Michael Redd or Ray Allen signing with the team during the upcoming off-season. In fact, reporters have mentioned Redd's name so often some people probably assume that he will be a Cav next year. But as we saw with the MLB free agent signing bonanza this winter, a team shouldn't throw money at a guy just because he's the only available option.
   
   Redd and Allen will certainly be looking for humongous paydays, especially Allen (who I think has mentioned the dreaded term "max contract" at some point). The problem is that both players are aging and wouldn't nearly be worth the money that they're asking for by the end of the new contract. I know Redd isn't quite as old as Allen, but he's not getting any younger and no one can seriously expect him to keep up this same level of production 5-6 years down the line. The same goes for Ray Allen. A big contract to either player has the definite possibility of becoming an albratross after a few seasons. And as Cavaliers fans, we know the benefits of avoiding debilitating cash vacuums *cough* Shawn Kemp *cough* Wesley Person *cough*.
   
   What makes Redd and Allen so appetizing to Cavaliers fans is that everyone has noticed the team's inability to make 3-pointers--a strength of both players. However, there are plenty of cheaper great long distance shooters who are available every off-season. Just looking down the top 3-point shooters in the league so far this season, you'll see the likes of Fred Hoiberg, Damon Jones, Eric Piatkowski, Jon Barry, and former Cavalier legend Jason Kapono in the Top 10. Among qualified players, Allen is #41 and Redd is #52. Great shooters can be signed on the cheap during the off-season, or even usually found in the 2nd-round of the draft, as Kapono and Kyle Korver have been in recent years. In fact, I believe the Cavaliers already have a great 3-point shooter on the roster, Luke Jackson.
   
   I'm not advising that the Cavaliers avoid signing either player, certainly they both have more skills than just shooting (unlike Kapono, Korver, or Hoibergian players). I actually do want the team to sign Michael Redd, but only for the right price. The team ought to right now set a reasonable maximum price that they're willing to pay and that won't kill the team's salary cap in the near future. The new GM should have the courage to refuse to overpay either player because you can find a great, cheap long-distance shooter if you look hard enough no matter the reaction this will draw from the sportstalk world or an anxiety-ridden, meddling owner.
   
   
6. Don't draft for potential. I'm not telling the team not to draft a high school player or an inexperienced college kid, but make sure they have the skills necessary to play in the NBA. There is a high bust rate when teams draft a player merely for his athleticism and assume the coaches will teach him how to actually play basketball. Clevelanders have seen a fantastic example of this in DeSagana Diop. Apparently, before he was drafted, Diop had only been playing basketball for 4 years or so. He was picked because he is big and athletic, not for extraordinary basketball skills.
   
   Sadly though, the Cavaliers have traded away so many picks this season, it's doubtful the team will get much of a chance to build through the draft. Boston gets the 2007 1st-round pick (Top 10 protected) in the Jiri Welsch deal; The Bobcats have the 1st-round pick (lottery protected through 2008) the Cavaliers extracted from the Raptors for Lamond Murray in the Sasha Pavlovic deal; the Bobcats also have the Cavaliers' 2005 1st-round pick (which was once lottery protected, but for some reason after the Welsch trade lost all conditions) which the team originally gave to the Suns way back in the day for Wesley Person; Orlando receives the Cavs' 2005 and 2007 2nd-round picks in the Drew Gooden deal. So unless the Cavaliers make a draft day trade, it seems unlikely there'll be any rookies on the team next year.
   
   This all but shuts the door on my little dream of drafting Jawad Williams. I know he is not heralded as great, but he is a Cleveland native (which always helps a lot), he can shoot very well for a big guy (6'9"), and he can do a lot of different things well. Of course, I'm not delusional enought to think that Williams will be a star, but I see him being a great role player off the bench in the NBA--which would provide depth to the Cavaliers which they badly need.

If the team were to follow my plan this off-season to the tee, I think I would pee myself. I actually expect them to probably hire former players at both GM and coach and happily trod along Dan Gilbert's path to the cellar of the NBA. Well, that's a bit of an exagerration. I'll give the team a little more credit than that. However, it's all but certain that the team, given the oppurtunity, will badly overpay for shooting and defense (the most obvious skills lacking this year) just to appease themselves and the fans. Also, the Cavaliers won't take advantage of the opportunity to play a little basketball Moneyball.

With the dream of a perfect season already dashed (due in no small part to the obvious cheating by every single member of the White Sox, including backup catcher Chris Widger), I decided to take a look at what fate befits our Indians. Using data from the last 20 seasons (1985-2004):

Winning percentage in first game of the season

All playoff teams     .569
Teams in LCS          .605
Teams in World Series .632

By the way, before the invention of the wildcard in 1994, all four teams making the playoffs made the LCS. The Indians therefore, technically, will be running against the trend when they make the playoffs. At least the Twins lost too.

P.S. About the title: as much as I'd like to see the Indians run off 161 straight wins, I think we need to be realistic.

While I could wish that the Cavaliers performance tonight was a practical joke, sadly it wasn't. But thanks to everyone who voiced their enjoyment of our take on an April Fool's Day joke. We'll be leaving up our articles in the archives, but to anyone who missed out on the wacky new masthead and tagline we're also maintaining a mirror of the April Fool's Day edition.

T-Minus 63 hours!

This article was part of our April Fool's Day 2005 content.

We don't care if football season is long over and the draft still weeks away. Our devotion to the gold and black runs deeper than any calendar! After that crushing, humiliating, emphatic, embarassing, crushing loss in the AFC championship game that surely made all of our fellow Steeler fans pee in their pants repeatedly, we're eager to drown out our misery. And what better way to do it than with a very special off-season edition of Born and Raised... 'n dat? Yinz won't find coverage like this anywhere else! Yinz, I say!

Play of the Week

Alex says: Seeing as that the season has been over for some time, I've been watching a lot of ESPN Classic: "22 seconds remaining... and Bradshaw is back and looking again... Bradshaw running out of the pocket, looking for someone to throw to... fires it down field... and there's a collision... it's caught out of the air!!!"

Corey says: I have it on good authority that even though the Steelers aren't playing any official games this time of year, Ben Roethlisberger still found time to throw a touchdown pass to Hines Ward in the corner of the endzone the other day. The best part was when he evaded 14 tackles, rescued three drowning orphans, faked out the defense, composed a string quartet in E minor, cured cancer, then threw a bullet pass to a diving Ward with 0:00 left on the clock, to win the game by a thousand!

Player of the Week

Alex says: I think I have to go with Hines Ward, because he's such a great blocker. Every time you see that Bus driving up the field, you just know that Hines set it up. Oh wait, I change my mind! I gotta go with The Bus, Jerome Bettis. Because when you hit The Bus up high, you're not a tackler, you're a passenger! Just turn the ignition, and this Bus is making no stops... until the ENDZONE!

Corey says: I have to go with Joey Porter, for being such a class act and the greatest linebacker to grace the Earth since Jack Lambert. Sometimes, when I'm feeling angry and alone, I just think, "What would Joey do?" and life suddenly seems a little bit more worth living.

Mike Schneck Honorary Special Teams Moment of the Week

Alex says: I choose Antwaan Randle El because he is, without a doubt, the most underrated player in professional sports right now. I don't care what the nerds at Football Outsiders say about his punt returning, he is simply the most electrifying player in the National Football League. It's been scientifically proven that when Antwaan gets the ball, yinz can't stop him!

Corey says: Well, even though our beloved punter appears to have left his best days behind him--about twelve months behind him, in fact--he still gets my vote for the MSHSTMOTW. For what, exactly, I'm not sure, but let's all down a pint of ketchup in honor of the late, great Chris Gardocki!

Obscure Steeler of the Week

Alex says: Special teamer/wide receiver Sean Morey wins for having the most interesting backstory on the team. His wife, Cara, is a defender for the Brampton Thunder of the Women's Hockey League. His father, Dennis, is a lobsterman. His brother, Dean, a fisherman. During the offseason Sean and his family live in Dorset, Ontario (3 hours north of Toronto) where he trains by "chopping wood and running in the snow." Plus, he went to an Ivy League school.

Corey says: I choose #56, backup center Chukky Okobi. "Chukky", which is short for Chukwunweze (no joke), is now a five-year veteran out of Purdue. He enjoys reading, swimming, long walks on the beach, and donuts with jimmies on them.

Fashion of the Week

Alex says: It's got to be the #51 "FARRIOR". In 2004, James tied for 2nd in the AFC with 3 fumble recoveries! He just has a tremendous football nose for the football. He always is around when the football is loose. He's just a tremendous football player.

Corey says: How about the home-black #43 "POLAMALU"? The best part about this jersey is that, with a doofy hairstyle, you can't read the name on the back, which makes it harder for opposing offenses to know who you are, or something. Unless they know you from the hairstyle. Hm.

Cheater of the Week

Alex says: I have to go with the NFL league office, for holding back the Steelers. Obviously the refs were paid off before the start of the AFC Championship game. It's the only way to explain these outrageous quotes from the NFL.com wire reports:

Tom Brady and Bill Belichick were an unbeatable combination again for the Patriots, exposing all of the Steelers' weaknesses to end their 15-game winning streak.... Brady gave the inexperienced Ben Roethlisberger a lesson in quarterbacking a championship game.... Belichick upstaged can't-win-the-big-one Steelers coach Bill Cowher....

Corey says: It's those damn Browns fans. They're so much more passionate, intelligent, loyal, and good-looking than us, it's just not fair! We Steelers fans know that the key to being a good fan is waving a dirty towel around over your head, and talking like an idiot 'n dat. Anyone who doesn't realize this is a cheater in my book.

Next week: Don't get your hopes up.

This article was part of our April Fool's Day 2005 content.

During these past few weeks of turmoil and losing for the Cavaliers, a lot of explanations have been offered up by "experts", "writers" or even "self-serving blogging know-it-alls". But there is one thing about this team that everybody would agree on: LeBron James is freakin' awesome.

To save a little of your (and my own) time, I won't expound on LeBron's amazing skills and likability. But rest assured, it's there. That is why the Cavaliers front office must open their eyes to unorthodox scenarios. Like it or not, the best way to take advantage of this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity is to act fast!

TRADE LEBRON JAMES NOW! I know this seems counterintuitive at first, but LeBron's trade value is as high now as it has ever been! Other GMs probably think that he could walk on water at this point. In other words, there will never be a better day to cash in The Chosen One. Jim Paxson has to prove to the fans of Cleveland and his new bosses that he's not some fuddy-duddy, old-fashioned GM; that he's willing to think outside the box and be creative. So with nothing but the Cavs' best interests in mind, here are a few deals that we think would really be steals for the Cavaliers, and I think the other teams involved could really buy into them too.

LeBron to San Antonio for Bruce Bowen and a a 2nd-round pick

What have been the Cavs' two most glaring problems this season? Three-point shooting and defense. Bowen is both a great 3-point shooter and defender--things LeBron is still working on. Most importantly, he has the veteran experience and playoff success that the Cavs need more than anything. Plus, it's not like the Spurs are going anywhere anytime soon, so that draft pick would be likely to yield some serious sugar.

LeBron to Detroit for Darko Milicic

This is perhaps the most obvious deal. It would make so much sense for the Cavaliers. Think about it. Championships won: Darko 1, LeBron 0. Percentage of years played in which a championship was won: Darko 100%, LeBron 0%. Plus, they were drafted in more or less the same position, so the salaries ought to match up and stuff. Plus, Darko is younger.

LeBron to Portland for Darius Miles and Richie Frahm

DMiles is still a great athlete, and I have a pretty good hunch he'll learn a jumpshot during the off-season and be unleashed on the rest of the NBA in 2005-2006. This trade would have the added value of making sure that LeBron goes to the Western Conference, where the Cavs won't have to compete against him. Not that he'll stand a chance against the power duo of Miles and Frahm.

LeBron and Anderson Varejao to New Jersey for Vince Carter

Vinsanity would almost certainly be double-reborn in Cleveland as the league's new, old, new superstar. But of all the compelling reasons to make this trade, perhaps the biggest is the fact that Carter, unlike James, has a college degree, so he is almost certainly smarter than LeBron. Same goes for Varejao, too. I mean, who even knows what kind of crazy stuff he learned while in Tasmania, or wherever?

Now remember, these are just suggestions, and I haven't worked out the salary-cap numbers yet. But don't be surprised if Jim Paxson calls a press conference soon. I wish the best of luck to LeBron in the future, just not in Cleveland. While some "fans" might bemoan that we'd be losing a great player--just be happy we won't have to suffer through LeBron's decline and then even possibly see him walk with no compensation.

This article was part of our April Fool's Day 2005 content.


The World's Greatest Mascot and his new trainee

This article was part of our April Fool's Day 2005 content.

Much is being said about the Indians' offseason. "Mark Shapiro added valuable depth." "He added veteran leadership." "The team couldn't afford any good free agents." One thing most everyone can agree on is that the Indians will contend in 2005. I'm here to tell you that's not going to happen. Consider this: the Indians are dead last in the American League in the one stat that matters: winning.

No, it's not quite what you're thinking, but hear me out. When people try to predict the baseball season, they presumably make guesses based on previously established track records. And the fact of the matter is, the Indians, more than any other team in the AL, have a track record of not winning any World Series rings. Take a look:

         WS rings among the players
           on the current roster
Yankees            24
Red Sox            23
Angels             15
Rangers             4
Orioles             3
Tigers              3
White Sox           3
Blue Jays           2
Mariners            2
Athletics           1
Royals              1
Twins               1
Devil Rays          0*
Indians             0

*The Devil Rays have 3 if you count Lou Piniella

Now, how in the world are the Indians supposed to contend for a World Series title if not a single man among them has any experience in doing so? For example, say what you will about the Blue Jays' chances in the East, but with guys like Miguel Batista and Gregg Zaun on their roster--proven winners--they will always have a shot.

Mark Shapiro has made a couple of shrewd moves this winter, but he failed to make the one move that would have meant it all for this franchise: picking up a proven winner. Now we will have to bow our heads and pray that a Scott Spiezio, a Tony Womack, or even a Greg Colbrunn becomes available at the trading deadline. Me? I'm not getting my hopes up.